Monday, May 31, 2010

Well, Some Lady is Singing Somewhere...

Because my current "adventure" at Valley High School is over. I taught my last class on Wednesday and cleaned out my class room on Friday. I still have to turn in my keys, and I have a couple little things to manage over the next couple of weeks. Not to mention all the letters of recommendation I will need to pick up...ugh.

Several weeks ago, I was beyond distraught. It was very hard for me not to cry if the topic of my lay-off came up. And I was angrier than all get out. I'm pretty sure I started manufacturing venom.

Then, about two weeks ago, something strange happened. I stopped caring so much about losing my job. I'm not sure what it was: being super happy about my graduation, applying to a ton of admin jobs, staying up too late watching the Lost series finale, etc. But all of sudden, the tears stopped. (And most of the venom too.)

I had lots of "tear" tests this weeks, but so far my cheeks have remained dry. First, my first class I taught at Valley graduated. I went to graduation, which I haven't done before. It was actually really cool, and it was awesome to see the kids so happy, but nope, no tears.

Then, I said good-bye to all my classes. I cleaned out my room. I had the "final" lunch with my friends. I even found out who is teaching Honors English 10 next year. Through it all, I remained smiling. And it wasn't a fake smile. I told my kids that everything will work out, and amazingly enough, I believe it.

Don't get me wrong, I still have panicky moments. And I'm sure that if I don't get interviews out of my applications that I will be UNHAPPY. (Watch out for venom below.) But I actually experienced a thrill of excitement a few moments ago when I realized that the whole summer is mine. Well, Emerson's, and Justin's, and mine, but you get the idea.

So, here's to the end. I may go back, but I kinda don't think so. It's been a good, sometimes rocky, three years. I know that I am a stronger person and teacher for having worked at Valley. It was hard to leave my safe haven of Milpitas, but I'm really happy I stuck through the difficult times. I have been a very lucky teacher.

2 comments:

Sarah said...

I am sorry you lost your job but happy you don't have any venom right now. Take care!

Dr. Love said...

Good for you Hillary. My husband got laid off too. He's still panicking some about it a month later. Enjoying the summer is going to be the best thing ever.